Jewish wedding

[ribbit]

A young Jewish chap (we'll call him David) fell in love and wanted to get married, but being an innocent and unworldly sort of chap, he decided to ask his rabbi for advice.

David - 'What is the secret of a good marriage Rabbi?'
Rabbi - 'You must be a loyal and loving husband, and keep your wife happy'
David - 'I will be loyal and loving, but how do I keep her happy?'
Rabbi - 'There are many ways to keep a woman happy, but the thing that gives them most pleasure is this...(holds up middle finger)'
David - 'And what is this finger used for Rabbi?'
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
Rabbi - 'Counting the money, dear boy, counting the money'

[bobh]

My uncle, who was in the rag trade in the east end for many years, has a large fund of Jewish jokes. My favourite, although it's best demonstrated live, is:

"Danny - why do Jewish people have short necks?"

Danny (shrugs in exaggerated manner with hands held out palms upwards) - "No idea, my boy."